I've uncovered the secret to creating a rabidly addicting video game. It's
really quite simple: start with a starving Japanese programmer, and
convince him to come work for you with promises of mediocre pay and stale
vending machine food. For the first
week of their employment, lace the
twinkies
with meth, and task them with creating a children's game. Once the basics
of the game are complete (this should only take a week, given their state
of mind), triple the twinkie dosage, and tell them they have five days to
finish the game. Then, feed the game's text through
Google Translator, and
have an American crack addict "spice it up" a bit for good measure. The
end result, I suspect, will be something like
Katamari Damacy,
and while you won't understand why, you'll be as addicted to it as a
certain game programmer is to
twinkies.